Dolls, Hibachi, Assault, and Squirt Bottles; This one if PG-13!

Here is something to ponder the next time you are enjoying your eel and avocado roll; a restaurant Hibachi chef in Murfreesboro,TN is  in trouble for sexual assault; he use the little doll that doubles as a squirt bottle to squirt a male customer while preparing the man's meal on a Hibachi grill.  Did I mention the little doll was a little boy, and he squirted water from his dolly peepee?


I have fond memories of this town; they antique malls were to die for, including one that featured GWTHW memorabilia.  I found the body to one of my Minerva tin heads there, a doll pictured in my book "With Love from Tin Lizzie; A History of Metal Heads . . . "  I attended a doll show there, and found a wonderful black papier mache nun from Kimport, and missed out on a Famlee doll with two heads;I still regret that one!  We ate a terrific Greek restaurant there, but I love sushi and all things Japanese cuisine, art, and doll.


We have those little boy squirt bottles at our own Osaka steak house, my favorite restaurant.  No one has even complained, or been threatened by the little plastic doll.  In fact, I'm trying to find one to add to my collection.


So, does the doll get arrested?  The chef?  In my other life as a professor of criminal justice and legal studies, we address many definitions of assault, and I don't mean to trivialize any of them.  Kids, log off this blog, now, I'm going to include something adult. Here is one from the US Department of Justice: "Sexual assault is any type of sexual contact or behavior that occurs without the explicit consent of the recipient. Falling under the definition of sexual assault are sexual activities as forced sexual intercourse, forcible sodomy, child molestation, incest, fondling, and attempted rape." (https://www.justice.gov/ovw/sexual-assault).  I'm pretty sure they all involve live people, unless a deadly weapon is involved. Let me channel my favorite criminal law prof, Professor Josie G.?  What do you think.  I now want to get on LEXIS and research cases involving dolls as deadly weapons. 


Just last night, I was discussing a post I did for the now defunct doll site on About.com Doll Collecting called "Free the Talega 11!" where a gated San Clemente community freaked out because one of its residents left lovely dolls on the porches of her neighbors as gifts. The officer in charge of the investigation talked about taking dolls into custody.  Really?  Hmmm. Something else to  ponder.


To understand this case further, perhaps we need to reread Prof. Erica Rand's book, "Barbie's Gay Accessory", which scandalized me at first, but which I read after my friend, author, collector, curator, the late Mary Hillier, suggested I should read it and anything else pertaining to dolls that I could, especially if I wanted to research them and write.


Wee Pee the Wee Wee Squirting Boy, public domain image.  Available online.


As for me, I have to say no one rivals Japan for its rich and continuing history involving all types of dolls, masks, statues, and figurines.  Everything from ancient clay figures to paper dolls, Hina figures, Ningyo, Kokeshi, Hakata, Karakuri, Noh masks, Bunraku puppets, occupied Japan items, wind up toys, Morimura Bros. dolls, manga figures, Takara Barbie, and more has contributed to the dialog and culture of doll collecting.  I salute and honor them.


I think this little squirt doll is made in China, but no matter.  It was used in a sushi house.  Dolls as kitchen utensils are a whole other fun category.  I see new ones all the time, and try to buy a few here and there.  Max von Boehn wrote about them in his seminal work Dolls, Dover Books, transl. Josephine Nichols. I highly recommend the book.


As for me, I'm going find that little squirt bottle guy.  Anatomically correct dolls don't bother me; they are part of doll history. No one is bothered by him at our restaurants.  I did have an interesting discussion involving sushi the other day.  One of my colleagues, a young woman who was also my student in literature class, told me that our former custodian had an interesting conversation with her about her sushi lunch.  He caught her in our teachers' lounge, and enlightened her to the fact that all "ladies" smell like fish.  I know, don't go there.  He is no longer with us, but yesterday, I spilled canned salmon on my favorite black taffeta skirt.  Hmmmmm!