3 am musings; 3am is the Darkest Hour of the Soul

Or, so said to that effect F. Scott Fitzgerald. Barring Saturday, I haven't slept since Friday night with one thing or another. So, I tried the usual remedies, and watched my Perry Mason on MeTV, and just did the dishes. I've read, and knitted, and watched Emma-cat sleep, but maybe it's just been to much of a week. We lost at a young age a good friend at work very suddenly; he was a father, son, teacher, marathoner, financial analyst, good friend, caring roommate. It really was too much. One week ago, I was talking with him at length, shop talk and life in general. He had finished one marathon and was training for another at 52, probably in the best shape of his life. Now, he's gone, literally ashes for eternity, dust in the mind of history. None of us will forget him, but coping is very hard. I am shocked at the lack of compassion so many have, and how they think his unexpected death will somehow impact them. Blind mouths; small minds. I have thought of much tonight, of those I love, of how much I've lost. I keep thinking of Mother's Day, and how for me, it is another trip to the cemetery, and my mom hated cemeteries. One of my original 49 tips was "be spritiual, whatever that means to you!" Now, I have to emphasize that for everyone. I try for productive insomnia, and hope for even one solid hour of rest, but this sinus garbage won't set me free this year. This is at least the 4th or 5th time this year, and the last two felt like a walking pneumonia. RE my post on toxins; there are more in facial scrubs and some antibacterialk soaps. Google the topic, and read carefully. I know I can't use certain apricot scrubs due to an allergic reaction, and a certain plus version of a popular cough syrup makes me look like I have pink eye. Plant flowers or trees this weekend for someone you love, and have peace. Tell everyone you love, that you love him/her. You don't know if it will be the last time you see each other. Smile at a stranger; my first grade teacer told us we were all brothers and sisters. It isn't a bad thought. As hard as it is in an election year, try not to judge anyone. If we can't forgive, then try to forget. Sleep well. Now would be a good time to read F. Scott.